1) i don’t feel like making a list

2) i’m not hungry enough for dessert

3) NO WAY can i have another drink tonight!

4) i have the perfect body (not a surprise when you consider items 2 & 3)

5) you’re smarter than me

6) i don’t feel like playing Trivial Pursuit

7) i love the suburbs

8.) i’m going to miss my soul-sucking corporate job (which i’m leaving forever on march 28! woohoo!)

9) i have enough jewelry

10) my parents are normal